Charting again

Wow. I haven't done a "real" fertility chart (taking and recording temps and all the rest) since February/March of 2005! That's three years ago--I hope I remember how!! I did a few "birth control" charts in the meantime, but never stuck with it because it didn't really matter whether I was ovulating and I only really thought I might be pregnant maybe twice??...in the meantime.
So. Today I printed out my Taking Charge of Your Fertility "pregnancy achievement" charts!!! Only slightly different from the birth control ones, I'm not even sure how. For me, it's mental. Everything has the "best chance of GETTING pregnant" idea behind it, rather than avoiding it. Bye-bye, condoms!!
It's funny because I once read how many women try to avoid getting pregnant at all costs for YEARS. Then all the sudden they're married and thinking they'd like to start a family and BAM! You expect your body to follow suit?? You've been telling it for so long, "Don't get pregnant, don't get pregnant, don't get pregnant" but just because you suddenly change your mind, your body is suppose to "snap to???" Y'right!! The book or article suggests taking some time to sort of change modes, to give your body a chance to catch up. Start telling yourself, "I am open to getting pregnant...My body welcomes a fertilized egg..." etc., etc. It's interesting.
And that's where I'm at...almost.
I printed out three. Sometimes my cycles run that long--40 days--but talk about wishful thinking, huh? Getting pregnant after three tries would be a miracle. A wonderful, wonderful miracle.
So what about the "almost?" Well...The Paladin and I were ready with Monkey. We'd been "trying" off and on for about six months, three times where everything lined up and we had a really good chance. Close to when we actually conceived, we were praying for a pregnancy, doing everything we knew how to increase our chances, and both kinda felt...ready. And felt like that one "took." And it did. We were thrilled!
We're not there yet. The Paladin is still hesitant about having a new baby. Then again, we enjoy Monkey so much and are pretty amazing parents and time is ticking...so the timing seems right, especially since the whole November/December baby issue is over for now.
Yet still, the hesitation. I often wonder, is anyone EVER really "ready???" Does anyone think, "Gee, life is so easy right now. We've got lots of money to spare, plenty of free time, TOO much sleep...we should have a new baby!!"
Monkey would be three. He'd be helpful, verbal, preschool-age.
I'm thirty!! Not getting any younger, folks!! We wait three MORE years before a third child and I'll be almost "high risk" by then. Yikes. And frankly, I'd like to get this baby stuff behind us. Don't get me wrong--I looooove babies, I am definitely a "baby person." BUT--there is a certain amount of freedom that comes with having school-age children. It'd be nice to get there before we're 50!!
So...ready...hmmm. Not quite. Probably will "try" in April, though. I'm thinking this will be a strong cycle.
Sigh...charting is a pain. Gotta start the whole thermometer/light/pen by the bed thing. Ugh. It's worth it, though...right?? :)