new ovulation day and a dream

Ugh, I dislike this GREATLY. Three tests, all negative, but still feeling a little "off" (drooling, a little light-headed) and no appearance by AF--and no indications that it's impending. So!! Back to analyze my chart!! My temps were a bit wanky for a while, with taking them so early and all, so I have two cover lines. I did have a second brief fertile-seeming period of a couple days two days AFTER the first fertile period. Thankfully, we "did it" on BOTH fertile days. Phew.
So...if my peak day was in fact two days later than I'd originally thought, that'd put me getting a positive test result...tomorrow. Grr. And, of course, it's possible that it didn't "take" at all...I just wish I'd get some conclusive news. It's nice, I suppose to still have hope for this cycle, despite my reading my chart wrong initially...but it makes me feel dumb at the same time! :)
I'm looking at my chart now...and I'd probably have had a positive test by now with the earlier conception date, unless the tests I've taken have been REALLY weak. And, actually, the later ovulation date makes more sense...and my temps have been quite high, even the past several days. I just got a little ahead of myself!!
So...tomorrow I will test again. Even The Paladin said, "Give it 'til the weekend."
MY DREAM!! Oh, let's see...Wednesday night, I was feeling a little anxious and asked the Lord to give me a dream to help me walk through this season. I'm not sure what I was expecting...but I got a baby dream! I had just had a girl--hadn't even nursed her yet--and ooooohhh, how I loved her!! She was tiny and I was holding her in my lap, just like I held my niece on Friday.
Now The Paladin has been saying for a while that he "knows" what the gender of our next baby will be. He's freakishly good at "knowing" a lot of things. I'd think he's just a good guesser, but...he's right more like 90% of the time, maybe more. So he wouldn't tell me what gender...until I told him my dream. "Yeah, the next one's a girl," he told me. Wow. It was prophesied to us that we'd have multiple children and that one would be feisty and one would be red-headed. Could we be getting a red-headed baby girl soon?? We'll see!
So...a nice dream, and I felt very comforted by it, like God was saying, "It'll happen. Just hang in there. I've got it all planned out." Now the girl part...I dunno. I don't think I'll be out buying pink just yet.
I had dreams with Monkey, too. About giving birth with two other women, and low and behold, they both became pregnant soon after I did. Well, one used a surrogate, but still. So...I certainly don't discount them.
My brain runs amuck. I have a long day tomorrow so if the test is negative again and no AF, I'll be really distracted.
I was pretty sure with Monkey. But didn't want to get my hopes up. Am I AS sure this time?? I don't know. Wishing and hoping for something and truly believing it will happen are two different things, and hard to separate. I do have hope.
If I'm not pregnant this cycle, I'll feel so...silly. Isn't that...silly?? To feel silly?? There's just something about hoping and hoping and hoping, and it not happening, that makes you feel...silly!! Especially when you want it so bad. It's like wanting it should make it happen, or you didn't want it enough!
It's a good thing I believe in God's perfect timing. I do feel peace about this. no matter what the outcome.